wonderfully described definitions


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LECTURE:

An art of transmitting Information
from the notes of the lecturer
to the notes of students
without passing through the minds
of either 

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CONFERENCE:

The confusion of one man
multiplied by the
number present 

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COMPROMISE:

The art of dividing
a cake in such a way that
everybody believes
he got the biggest piece 

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TEARS:

The hydraulic force by which
masculine will power is
defeated by feminine water-power! 

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DICTIONARY:

A place where divorce comes
before marriage 

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CONFERENCE ROOM:

A place where everybody talks,
nobody listens
and everybody disagrees later on 

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ECSTASY:

A feeling when you feel
you are going to feel
a feeling
you have never felt before 

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CLASSIC:

A book
which people praise,
but never read 

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SMILE:

A curve
that can set
a lot of things straight! 

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OFFICE:

A place
where you can relax
after your strenuous
home life 

cid:image014.jpg@01CD5009.BDF96BA0
YAWN:

The only time
when some married men
ever get to open
their mouth 

cid:image015.jpg@01CD5009.BDF96BA0
ETC:

A sign
to make others believe
that you know
more than
you actually do 

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COMMITTEE:

Individuals
who can do
nothing individually
and sit to decide
that nothing can be done
together 

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EXPERIENCE:

The name
men give
to their
Mistakes 

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ATOM BOMB:

An invention
to bring an end
to all
inventions 

cid:image019.jpg@01CD5009.BDF96BA0
PHILOSOPHER:

A fool
who torments himself
during life,
to be spoken of
when dead 

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DIPLOMAT:

A person
who tells you
to go to hell
in such a way
that you actually look forward
to the trip 

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OPPORTUNIST:

A person
who starts taking bath
if he
accidentally falls
into a river 

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OPTIMIST:

A person
who while falling
from EIFFEL TOWER
says in midway
“SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!” 

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PESSIMIST:

A person
who says that
O is the last letter
in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter
in OPPORTUNITY 

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MISER:

A person
who lives poor
so that
he can die RICH! 

cid:image025.jpg@01CD5009.BDF96BA0
FATHER:

A banker
provided by
nature 

cid:image026.jpg@01CD5009.BDF96BA0
CRIMINAL:

A guy
no different
from the other,
unless he gets caught 

cid:image027.jpg@01CD5009.BDF96BA0
BOSS:

Someone
who is early
when you are late
and late
when you are early 

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POLITICIAN:

One who
shakes your hand
before elections
and your Confidence
Later 

cid:image029.jpg@01CD5009.BDF96BA0
DOCTOR:

A person
who kills
your ills
by pills,
and kills you
by his bills!  

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